Sunday, September 30, 2007

Sick, Sad World!

Things that make me wonder about the world we live in:

1. My dad commented tonight that he's not entirely sure when he's supposed to be this week, and when he does know where he's supposed to be, he doesn't remember why he's there. No, he's not going crazy. He travels FAR too much!

2. The GEICO cavemen are now the basis of a sitcom! While the commercials are entertaining, I think we all agree that a sitcom is TOO MUCH of a good thing!

3. In the latest idiotic attempt to socialize medicine, Democrats and some lame-brain Republicans have defined a child as being age 25 and younger. The fact that I am still considered a youthful infant almost distracts me from fact that people STILL think that socialized ANYTHING is a good plan after seeing it FAIL HORRIBLY in countries around the world as well as here at home. But I must remember that I am an idiot peon voter who cannot manage my own retirement or health care.

Word of the Day

I recently signed up to receive a word of the day from by email. The first word was "pronunciamento," which is simply a self-aggrandizing cognate for a pronouncement. Next came "doff" and "precipice." I know these words! Either I'm too smart for word of the day, or the words they pick are just too simple. Come on! Bring it!

Wednesday, September 05, 2007

To Mex-Ameri-Canada!

"Where there is a Mexican, there is Mexico. Mexico does not end at it's borders."

While statements like this might perturb the everyday American, the nitwits we employ to govern just don't seem to get it!! At least I can revel in the following sarcasm:

"An open letter to President Felipe Calderon. Coming off Labor Day, Mr. President, there is just not a better time to talk about the American worker than now. Hard working, dedicated, loyal, resourceful, inventive, honest. The American worker is the model by which employees around the world should aspire to be like, but there are those jobs that exist that even the mighty American worker just won't do. Luckily that's where you come in, Mexico. I'm so excited to hear the news that trucking companies from Mexico are now operating freely here in the United States. Honestly it seems like such a logical idea with absolutely no flaws whatsoever. I mean, what could possibly go wrong, Felipe? It's not like your country has millions of peoples willing to pile themselves up like human sardines just to cross the border illegally. No, uh-uh. If that were the situation, then I'd be a little worried. However, since Mexico has a vibrant economy, a surplus of great jobs, unmatched pride and simply no corruption whatsoever, I'm completely at ease with the idea of giant trucks from Mexico roaming around here in the U.S. if you didn't have a country with such integrity and such spirit, one might consider this program simply a bad idea. Plus, it's not like there's all kinds of drug problems south of the border or terrorists out there are looking for new ways to penetrate our border with large caches of weapons or even a nuclear weapon. That's certainly not happening and if it was, I'd certainly be concerned if that threat were out there, obviously if terrorists knew about available transportation across the U.S. border with such large storage capacity, we'd be all over them because they'd be all over that. But thankfully Americans know that no amount of money besides maybe $75 or, call me crazy, a hundred bucks is worth selling out America over to any Mexican. >From the bottom of our hearts, President Felipe, we'd like to share this monumental step towards a borderless north Mexico with a toast. To Mex-Ameri-Canada. Seriously, you provide us so so many valuable goods, many more than the commonly known imports from Mexico, hoards of illegal immigrants, hard core narcotics, and those funny hats. You give our large corporations really cheap labor, and I don't even know how to repay you for that. Felipe, I've got to run. Got to get back to the beach, but I'd like to close by addressing the naysayers to let you know that they don't speak for the majority of Americans. Well, actually they do, but you don't have anything to worry about with those guys because the people in charge, the American politicians, they don't listen to the naysayers, either. So relax, kick back, and enjoy Labor Day. Sincerely, just some slug from America. " ~GB